What Nobody Tells You About Building Side Projects as a Parent

For as long as I can remember, side projects have been part of my identity. My wife has actually told me that if I didn't have one going, she'd think something was wrong with me. Whether in high school, college, or beyond, there's always been something I'm working on. Side quests matter to me.

But the past five years as a dad have reshaped everything. Young kids need constant shepherding — they can't function without it. There's a heavy cost to that attention, one I'd pay tenfold over. I would sacrifice my side projects for my kids without hesitation.

And yet, I still try to find time to build. Here's the tension: I'm not willing to compromise the time and energy I invest in my children, but I also want to squeeze every ounce of productivity from the hours I do have for side work. It's an extremely difficult balance. I need more hours. I wish I could function on less sleep, but I can't.

So here's what nobody tells you: time is your most precious resource. Not energy, not ideas, not even skill. Time. And once you have kids, the supply doesn't just shrink — it becomes non-negotiable. Nobody tells you how good you had it until it's gone. And oh boy, is it gone.

AI has given me a 10x boost in productivity, which opens new possibilities. But it's not a magic bullet. The real challenge becomes optimizing how I use my time and attention. Even if I could spin up ten Claude Code instances, I only have so much brainpower to manage them. If I'm not disciplined about that, nothing gets accomplished.

There's no grand solution here. But I hope other dads out there — those trying to nurture side projects while refusing to shortchange their families — understand they're not alone in this struggle. The tension between building something you're passionate about while keeping your kids as the priority is real. And it's worth wrestling with.